How long should a courtship last before an engagement?

There is no single right length. Some couples know within months; others need a year or more. What matters is not the calendar but whether you have done the work a courtship is for.

By the time you become engaged, you should have talked through faith, children, money and home. You should have met each other's families and close friends. You should have seen each other tired, disappointed and under pressure, and liked what you saw.

A courtship that drifts for years without moving toward a decision is often a sign that one of you is unsure. A courtship that rushes past the hard conversations is a sign of a different risk.

Agree together on roughly when you each expect to decide, and check in honestly as that time approaches.